Summertime Sadness

18 May 2014

On Friday I fell hard. Call it sadness, moodiness, depression, whatever, names and labels mean nothing with this feeling around. All I know is I had the black dog and it was not letting me go. I will say quite simply I am not happy with where I am at the moment, and perhaps on Friday that just hit me really really hard. No amount of positive thinking was getting me out of this, so I decided it was time to ride the crap feeling wave. So I took some time to myself and didn't want to see anyone. Whether that's good or bad I don't know, but I made that choice. But when a friend I haven't spoken to in over a year and half, and haven't seen for even longer called me out of the blue this afternoon - I went out. Complete whim, it was sunny and I was sick of sitting indoors feeling sorry for myself. And perhaps it would just be nice to be with someone who really doesn’t know what a mess I've made of my life lately!

So I went and now I'm back and happy that I went because I had a wonderful time. I can feel the black dog simmering down right now. There is something about the sun that makes everything better and even I could look past my body issues to feel relaxed. I don't have any words of wisdom for anyone who maybe reading this and wanting to know how to deal with these moments. I just keep hoping that my resilience pays off one day. Aside from that look at my day in pictures - I ate yummy food, ice cream and had cocktails!

Chilli burger, onion rings and mac and cheese at Byron! There were some courgette fries somewhere...

 Drinks at Coco Bamboo

 Becuase I am a child this makes me laugh. 

Chin Chin Labs have a new creation - 'the brown-wich' and it's good, even if the name isn't so good! 

Going out was good for me today. For me it quietened down those doubts I had about myself. I can be okay, I can be “normal”. I hope you’re all enjoying your Sunday and just because of the topic of this post I am including these links Rethink and Mind for all your mental health information and needs. 

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